Exactly 2 years ago
04.40pm
'12 missed calls'
When I boarded my bus after my last exam and took my phone out, I saw 12 missed calls each from every single person in my family, except from my Muthachan (Grandfather). An inner fear grew within me, a bad intuition hit me. As a Sagittarian, I have always come across such intuitions which later would come true.
Nair asked,
'Whats the matter?'
'I guess, something is wrong at home', I said
'Everything will be fine', he said
I didn't believe him.
My phone started ringing, it was from my grandmother's phone.
'Hello, whats the matter?', I asked straight
'Nothing', it said
I knew it wasn't my grandmother. I did my best to recognize the voice, but I couldn't.
'Who is this?', I asked with hearts beating even faster. I knew something terrible is waiting to hinder me.
'I am Beena', she said
Beena is my ammuma's (grandmother's) sister in law.
'What happened?', I asked
'Nothing, where are you?', she asked
I got my wits off!
'Tell me what happened?', I asked sternly. My heart was beating too loud for me to hear each of its stroke.
'Muthachan hit with an accident and..' she said
I interrupted in shock:
'What?'
'Its ok, he is safe now', she said
I repeated the question:
'What happened?' with a harsh voice that came out of a paining heart
She cut the call. I tried calling, but she didn't accept. I was totally sunk in the ocean of imaginations and I couldn't accept any. I was in shock for the first time in my life. I saw a blank surrounding amidst the crowd. The picture of my grandfather rolled through my eyes at infinity speed in an arranged timeline.
Some drops of water started rolling down my eyes without my permission. I soon realized that, I am in college bus with people nearby. I wiped my first tear off and sat down with my head down. I wanted to reach my home as soon as possible. I wanted to see Muthachan, Ammuma and Kunjamman (My Uncle) right now!
Bus approached my stop and I got down with Amal as soon as the bus stopped. Thankfully, Amal's brother came over with his car to immediately get me home. I asked them to drop me much before my home. I started walking, or running to be apt to my home. I saw many people passing down to and fro from my home. My probabilities turned into certain deterministic conclusions. I saw the gate of my home wide open and many people gathered (this has happened only during any big occasions like marriage, engagement etc.). They all looked at me, I tried to escape there looks and walked straight to my ammuma. She was crying, but the sound came from her heart. I controlled my tears to the extreme and it was very necessary to help ammuma.
I still didn't knew what has happened, I just didn't want to know it. I sat down close to ammuma and hugged her as tightly as possible and she did the same. Her sobbing stopped, and I closed my eyes to see him(Muthachan) infront of my eyes, but in the darkness that my closed eyes provided. I responded with a tear which I didn't allow to come out.
I opened my eyes to see my bold and smart sister crying. My tear almost opened the gates, but my eye lids successfully blocked them.
I could hear my heartbeats amidst all the voices which was running behind.
'I want to see him, now', I said
I didn't knew who were there nearby, but everyone were afraid of my attitude change.
'There is nothing left, he has left us alone', Ammuma said
I didn't want to believe her!
'I want to see my Muthachan right now', I said
I sat still, until Bhasi(My Classmate) came home along with his mother. I saw him, and ran to him and said, 'Come onn, come with me nowww!'
He took the car and we drove to Ashwini Hospital. I saw my Kunjamman, many relative's, neighbors standing out there. I went straight to him and hugged him tightly. I knew my kunjamman since years, I have never seen him cry. Today, he cried and on hugging I heard his sounding heartbeats too.
'Where is Muthachan, I want to see him', I said
'None are allowed', my kunjachan said
'I WANT TO SEE HIM RIGHT NOW', I said
At my aggression, everyone accepted. I knew if I wouldn't see him, I would never believe whatever has happened. I was allowed in to the room named: 'Mortuary'.
I saw him, I saw his blood, his leg with as many scratches possible and I saw him at peace. I retreated!
I confirmed, I took a long breathe to see him just beside me and he talked:
'Don't cry! I don't like you crying', he said
In a moment, he wasn't there. I didn't cry!
I realised, the most beautiful person I have known in this world is no more.
I realised, the most beautiful lover I have known can't be felt anymore.
I realised, the most hardworking person I have known can't work anymore.
I saw the sky up and I could see him everywhere. I saw death, I saw grief and I saw myself losing the game called life.
I remember him saying: 'One day everyone will die'
I consoled my mind saying: 'That day, I will come to meet you'
2 years after that day, I still miss him a lot and this is my tribute to him:
My Restitution...!!!
